Kenzie is home, in Lewistown. And I'm not. That's really tough for me. I keep replaying all the memories and I miss her so much. I want to her laugh or some offensive joke or even her crying on the phone telling me if I drive fast I can make if before morning. I miss my sister. I miss my person to tell everything big or small, happy, sad or dumb.
I've gotten use to this life of grief but I still miss my old life. I miss getting texts with way too many vowels. I miss getting called a sensitive asshole for being so emotional. I want all that happiness that used to wrap me up.
Things are so different now. Today they drove into town and went to the new house. That little fact is hard to wrap my head around. 'Home' is a new place. Not the place I've lived, laughed, cried, fought in and ran away from. It's just a building but it's the place I became me. It was my jungle gym, safe place, and prison. It was the place where I spent my whole life.
"You don't know her like I do. You'll never understand and you don't know what we've been through. That girl's my best friend. There's no way you're gonna help me. She's the only one who can."
I deal with the pain because I am so lucky that I had that much to lose.
❤️
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