A lot has happened in the past two days, a couple very dear to my heart is going through a rough time. I haven't ever had two of my friends break up before, at least not where I was equally loyal to both parties. It's a tough situation. It all happened very quickly and was unexpected. My heart breaks for them. It was a long night and it's been a quiet day. No solution, we are just waiting for them to decide what is best for their relationship and themselves.
I find myself looking at my own relationship and holding too tightly. I am looking for all of the possible holes and trying to fill them. My world has been shaken. It's going to effect everyone that loves them. When things like this happens it makes you look inside of yourself and second guess everything that you and your partner have been through.
Everyone thinks that their own relationship is invincible. I know I did, you think "That can't happen to me, my partner and I are better then that because..." But you aren't. It can happen to anyone, nothing is permanent. Love is a privilege, it's something that you have to work at each and every day. If anything, I think that the further you get into a relationship the more work it is, it isn't new and exciting anymore and the 'glamour' is gone. I know that keeping the line between passion and comfort is something that we as a couple have struggled with. Especially with same sex relationships, it's hard to balance between best friend and girlfriend because there is such a strong emotional connection.
Think of it like you are madly in love with your very best friend of same sex. In a heterosexual relationship, the connection that you have with your best friend is different with the one that you have with your partner. I know that in a lot of relationships you often become best friends with your significant other but you still have a different relationship with your friends. Take the relationship you have with your friends and add attraction, romantic love and passion. The boundaries that you have with your man and friends are very different and defined. In same sex relationships those lines don't exist; that makes it that much harder to know what needs in the relationship need to be met.
Often in female couples you stop being lovers; it becomes strictly a friend relationship when the passion is gone. When this happens the people still love each other but it's difficult to differentiate between loving someone and being in love. After seeing your friends struggle you realize that being in love is something you have to work at everyday. You can't just expect to it to be rainbows and butterflies.
I'm sorry to hear that your friends are breaking up. It will be difficult to remain friends with both but it always works out exactly how it is meant to as it is/does with you and Starr. I'm also sad to hear that visitors have started to dwindle for Kenzie. The tried and true will never leave! The thoughts and prayers around town have not. She is never far from most people hearts. I love your love for your family. Only people with sisters can understand the relationship and it sounds as though you've had incredible times. I also love that you had the chance to celebrate such a cool girl as I have heard countless people say about your sister. My baby sister and I are just starting our relationship. Family is everything and I am full of gratitude that you remind me of that everytime I stop in to check on you:) Happy Thanksgiving to you. Save travels and smooth writing!
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